Friday, April 4, 2014

Fostering Love Across the Racial Divide


This past week, I spent a week in my hometown of Baltimore, Maryland, visiting family and long-time friends. It was a much-needed reprieve from the daily grind of my life in Arkansas. Just what the doctor ordered, as they say.

One highlight of my time there was an opportunity I had to babysit my "niece" Brittney. Brittney is the spunky, always-smiling 3-year-old girl that my sister Lori has fostered for two years now. She's the kind of child that gets noticed wherever she goes. My sister goes through her days constantly hearing refrains of "She is so friendly!" "Isn't she adorable?" "Is she always this bubbly?"

To which my sister answers, "Yes, she is."

Brittney has been a giggly, joyful addition to my family. And I don't know when we stopped remembering that she's of a different ethnicity. 

Brittney and Me*
Britt Britt, as we call her, is of Asian descent. But she fits in with our African American family as if she were born into it. Mind you, we're not oblivious of the questions and curiosity she'll face if she becomes a permanent member of our family through adoption. We're aware that her differences will add challenges to her life.

My sister has been proactive with Britt, and recently bought her a Mulan** doll. It shocked her to hear Brittney survey the doll, then respond, "Mommy, why do her eyes look funny?"

She's too young to know her eyes look a lot like Mulan's.



So we're not naive to think that raising a child from another race won't have its difficulties. We're not foolish enough to believe that "love will conquer all". 

But we are crazy enough to love this little girl to pieces, and to wish her the best life that God has in store for her -- despite her difficult beginnings and broken first family.

My 6-year-old daughter Jada -- who adores her cousin Brittney, by the way -- came to me recently about something she'd noticed about Brittney. Our conversation went like this:

Jada: "Mommy, Brittney looks different from everyone else in our family."

Me: "You think so? How does she look different?"

Jada: "Well, she has really fat cheeks, Mommy."

My response? I burst out in laughter, thankful for the innocence of a child's heart. 

Thankful that my children love this precious little girl in our family. 

Thankful that nothing can impede the love that God puts in our hearts for another.





* Since Brittney is still in foster care, I want to protect her identity. Funny note: I didn't think I'd ever use this crazy picture she insisted we take of her bumble bee toy!

** Mulan is the main character of Disney's 1998 animated movie "Mulan". I happen to LOVE this film for young girls, by the way.