So Many Davions: A Foster Child's Plea to the Church

Many of you have already read this story.

Some of you could almost feel your heart ripping out when you read it.

But in case you missed it...

It was an ordinary Sunday morning at St. Mark Missionary Baptist Church in St. Petersburg, Florida when 15-year-old Davion Only entered with his caseworker, Connie Going, by his side. This particular morning, he wasn't in church to merely sing hymns, pray, and listen to a good sermon.

Davion had a higher purpose on his heart and mind.

Armed with that purpose, he courageously addressed the congregation. Though fearful, he publicly asked for someone -- anyone -- to consider adopting him.* He asked for a family -- a family that could "reach out and get me and love me until I die."

And he's not picky. "I'll take anyone," he said. "Old or young, dad or mom, black, white, purple. I don't care. And I would be really appreciative. The best I could be."

Some might consider these tactics desperate. I say this young man has vision, and he knows the prognosis of his life is grim. Born to a mother while she was in jail, he's lost count of the many places he's lived. He currently lives in a group home, with 12 other troubled teenage boys.

Four months ago, his dismal situation got even worse. Sitting at a library computer with his birth certificate in hand, he searched for his mother's name for the first time. He found her mug shot online, noted her resemblance and read her rap sheet -- petty theft, cocaine.

Then he saw her obituary. His mother had died just a few weeks before. No chance of reunification now.

So yes, Davion's plea at St. Mark was a desperate one. He knows that with every passing year, month, week, day, and even minute, his chances of finding a forever family decreases. And he knows that if he ages out, his chances of a successful life are minimal.

A few statistics** for the 27,000 young people who age out of U.S. foster care each year:

• 40% become homeless or "couch surf" from home to home
• Nearly 60% of young men who age out have been convicted of a crime
• 52% of aged out males are unemployed
• 75% of young women who age out receive government benefits to meet basic needs
• 50% of all youth who aged out were involved in substance use

Not a pretty picture, is it?

It's the same picture that Davion, and so many "Davions" see when they dream of their futures. Especially African American foster children. Their dreams don't include a cap and gown, a wedding dress or carrying a briefcase to work one day.

But some of them still dream of one thing.

A family.

When Davion shared this dream at St. Mark, he said, "My name is Davion and I've been in foster care since I was born... I know God hasn't given up on me. So I'm not giving up either."

I pray we won't give up on the Davions of our communities, either.

* Since giving his plea at St. Mark Missionary Baptist, several people have inquired about adopting Davion. Let's pray that one of those inquiries will provide him with a loving, godly family.

** Statistics on aging out foster youth are from the Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute.

Daring to Dream: 4Kids of South Florida

By Carla Adair Hendricks

Last week, I had the awesome opportunity to join an amazing group of foster care advocates on a trip to Ft. Lauderdale, Florida.

I know what you're thinking... And yes, we did see the beach. Yet our mission was greater than any beach trip.

Our mission was to observe and learn from the awesome folks of 4Kids of South Florida, folks that have committed to provide "A Home for Every Child in Crisis."

Our mission is nearly the same. We've named ourselves the "No More Waiting" Team, with a commitment to finding the right family for every waiting child in Arkansas foster care.

Last week's trip was exhilarating, emotional and exhausting.

And I can't wait to see all God's going to do.

But I'll get to that later. For now, I'll recap all He already did.

First of all, God helped us celebrate all He's already done in Arkansas.

Our group represented three organizations* dedicated to foster children in Arkansas. I'll give a nutshell on each.

The CALL's (Children of Arkansas Loved for a Lifetime) mission is to educate, equip and encourage the Christian community to provide a future and a hope for children in foster care.

We do this by recruiting foster parents from local churches, then providing the DCFS-required training for these prospective foster parents. The CALL serves as a bridge between our state agency and local churches. We currently serve in a third of the counties in Arkansas, and have had incredible impact.

I serve the Statewide Board, and I had the privilege of sharing the Florida trip with both the Executive Director Lauri Currier and Co-founder of The CALL, Mary Carol Pederson.

Immerse Arkansas focuses on youth that have aged-out of foster care. Without hope and practical help, these young people face a dismal future. In fact, statistics reveal that 40% of youth that age-out of the foster care system will experience homelessness by the age of 24. Immerse Arkansas exists to give these young people support, guidance and stability as they transition to adulthood.

We were blessed to have the Director and Founder of Immerse Arkansas Eric Gilmore not only on our trip, but leading and coordinating it.

Project Zero exists to help find forever families for children that are available for adoption through the state foster care system. The Project Zero team also seeks to raise awareness surrounding the more than 100,000 children in U.S foster care waiting for a permanent and loving family.

Project Zero's Co-directors Christie Erwin and Caryl Watson were an amazing and energetic addition to our team.

Together these ministries are committed to at-risk children in out state. We are dedicated to "No More Waiting!"

Secondly, God helped us dream of what could be in our state.

And this, my friends, is where 4Kids of South Florida comes in.

Last week, we spent an entire day with various staff members of 4Kids. And if those folks don't fire you up for kids in foster care, you better check your pulse.

4Kids President Doug Sauder began and ended our time with a history of 4Kids, which was originally a merger of 3 separate organizations. He gave a nutshell of how they worked through growing pains and did the hard work of becoming a mature and highly-effective organization.

Thom Lukasik, Vice President of Community Engagement, spent almost the entire day with us -- and I think we considered kidnapping him and bringing him back to Arkansas with us. (Can you kidnap a grown man?)

Thom shared his ministry's vision with us, showed us the most moving video about foster children I've ever seem and answered the two million questions we had. He also took us on a tour of 4Kids' group homes and a special place I'll never forget -- SafePlace.

SafePlace is a temporary shelter for children placed in foster care. Envision this: instead of a child sitting in a state agency office, waiting for an open home to welcome him or her, SafePlace offers a warm, engaging environment for the child to stay, while waiting for that home.

When we first entered SafePlace, I think we'd all braced ourselves for a place full of weepy, forlorn and hopeless children. Actually, what we discovered was a place full of giggling, energetic, happy children! We were amazed and I even wondered, "Do these children know they were just removed from their homes? Separated from their families?"

It was amazing.

And I have to mention the beautiful little three-month old baby in a crib. And the volunteer -- yes, I said volunteer -- that told me she loved working in SafePlace so much that she asked if she could work extra hours until she finds full-time employment. A volunteer that's begging to double her hours. Now, that speaks volumes.

SafePlace is a dream I hope to see realized in Arkansas. Maybe I'll be able to share that here someday.

But for now, I'll leave you with a word from Doug Sauder that resonated with us all...

"The dream is free, but the journey isn't."

Ain't that the truth...

It costs nothing to dream of a home for every child in the US foster care system. It doesn't cost anything to dream of a day when we'll no longer need foster care shelters and group homes. Or a day when every sibling group can go to the same home -- together. 

But the journey to those dreams isn't free. These dreams will cost much: work, time, money, and more work, time and money.

But we must keep dreaming. And we must continue the journey.

* Our team also included Pastor Anthony Hendricks of Mosaic Church of Central Arkansas (and my hubby), Jeff Spry of City Connections, Mark and Jennifer Cherry of Summit Church, Diane Heffington of Immerse Arkansas and David Watson of Project Zero